- Mood:
Lonely
I feel like rantin' ... though my rants are never actually that long. Just words.
I don't know what I am or who I am.
I'm smart, but I'm not considered nerd.
I like anime, but not really an anime-freak.
I play sports, but I'm not a sporty girl.
I play violin, but I'm not a full musical person.
I draw when I want, but I'm not an artist.
I love to sing, but I'm not a singer.
I write poetry, but I'm not a poet.
I love to write, but I'm not a writer.
I like to make manga/stories, but I'm not a mangaka or a story-writer.
I dress in black, but I'm not goth.
I listen to heavy metal, but I'm not emo.
I cry alot, but I'm not depressed.
Or am i ?
I'm sooo fucking confused and tired of myself. I don't know
who my friends are or where I belong. Y'know, I haven't
ranted really about anything, but I am tired. The reason
why I haven't said anything because I don't want people
to know shit about me. But, I'm tired. I'm in pain, I'm
stressed, i'm upset, frustrated, confused, and just in
a plain shattering and breaking deep dark emotion where
I feel like I'm slowly suffering in a mental twisted way.
I FUCKING HATE IT.
I have friends, but not best friends. I don't have a best
friend. Sure, my boyfriend is basically my only best friend
but he's not in my school. He has friends too. I don't. I'm
glad everyone has a friend to go to. But i don't. I just hate
having the feeling where I have no one to go to. I'm lonely.
I'm weak. I'm scared. I'm pathetic. I even hate myself for
even fucking ranting. And now, you are probably saying "why
the hell are you ranting on having no friends ? you clearly
have friends, so shut up your fucking mouth and get the fuck
off deviantART because no one cares about your fucking drama."
Thanks, I'm glad to know that you THINK that. I fucking don't
care. I have no way to express myself, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA.
And you're probably ALSO saying "Oh, if you're sooooo depressed
and lonely over everything, just go to a therapist and or you
school guidance counselor." Sure, it's all fun and easy, but
that requires parents' attention. Go ahead, say that OH. Your
parents need to know or be like get over it and get the fuck
off here already. JUST LET ME FUCKING RANT. I want to cry. over
everything because I just can't take it. I can't talk to anyone
at all. Yeah, my friends can go "oh you can tell me anything and
you can talk to me whenever you need help ! (:" BUT YOU DON'T GET
IT !! I know i have friends, but I can't trust anyone. Because
once I tell someone something important, i immediately get
attached to them. I fucking don't know why. I'm like a leech.
I stick to you until you either stab me off your skin and stop
me from suckin' on you, or I just see you are uninterested in
talking to me. Maybe, i think my friends are sick and tired of me.
I don't know. I don't have a best friend to run to and know
they will always be excited to see me or be my partner in all
class activities. But yeah, i don't have a best friend. I used
to, but she has a better life without me. No, no fight ever came
between us, but she has moved on from her depressing life and she
has been doing better. I'm really tired of this bullshit. I am sick
and tired of myself as well because I fucking hate how I am ranting.
It just shows myself that I'm weak and pathetic. God, what the
fucking hell is wrong with me. Something or someone just stab me right
now and just end it. I hate this loneliness and pain. It's really
achin' and botherin' me. I hate it. i hate it. I hate it. I hate it.
What the fucking hell is wrong with me. I want to cry- but I can't.
I don't want to be lonely. but I can't. I want a best friend, but I
can't. IT'S ALL BECAUSE I'M FUCKING WEAK AND PATHETIC. YES. I'LL
CONSTANTLY SAY THOSE 2 WORDS BECAUSE I KNOW I AM. (: YES. I HAVE
CONCLUDED TO MYSELF THAT I AM WEAK AND PATHETIC. I JUST WANT A
BEST FRIEND THAT I KNOW WILL BE THERE FOR ME AND I CAN TALK TO.
I just want a friend.
Who will stop the bleeding of my wounds.
Who can finally make my heart
start pumping life back into me.
I just want a friend.
Who can save me when I stop breathing.
Who can reach out for me when I drown
in my own agony.
I just want a friend.
Who can always be there when I am down.
Who is able to make me smile everyday.
I just want a friend.
Who will always be there for me to talk.
Who will show me the true meaning of happiness.
I just want a friend.
Who will open my door and guide me to a new world.
Who will find me when I am lost in my own dark void.
I just want a friend.
Who will remember me when I am forgotten.
Who will let me live when I am suffering.
I just want a friend.
Who will notice me when I am invisible.
Who will hear me out when I'm silent.
I just want a friend.
Who will finally save me from myself.
Who can rescue me from my own depression.
I just want a friend.
That I can love and protect.
That I can finally say thank you to
when I realize what life really is.
And then smile to her and say,
"Thank you, my best friend."
I just want a friend.
Baah.
can i use your sweet panda for a banner for the hp of my friend? i like yor pics^^
As long as you put credit where credit is due.
When it's finished, I would like to see the
finished product. If it's going to be posted
on a website, please provide me the link therefore
I know where my artwork will be used.
--
（°ﾛ° "）
Thank you for adding my photographs to your Favorites / Collections List. Very much appreciated.
--
Clubs: =Birds-Club *wildlifephotography =NaturPics-club *Four-Seasons =flower-club *naturephotographer *Ex-po-zure *natures-beauty-club
If she does than thats me!!! >w<
--
I remember you ! :3
Heyy ! (: Just wonderin',
why the change in dA accounts ?
o:
--
（°ﾛ° "）
Previous Page12345...Next Page